The Big Bang Theory: Bernadette’s Funniest Quotes

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9. Season 7, Episode 18

Leonard: “You don’t go into science for the money.”
Bernadette: “Speak for yourself. Last month my company both invented and cured restless eye syndrome. Ka-ching, ya blinky chumps!”

Source: CBS

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8. Season 8, Episode 8

Stuart: “Oh, so she’s good enough for Howard but not for me?”
Howard: “Yeah.”
Bernadette: “Yeah. Go have weird relationships with your own mother and cousin. This is his turf.”

Michael Yarish/©CBS/courtesy Everett Collection

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7. Season 6, Episode 9

Amy: “I’ll drive. You can see where the tow truck scratched my car.”
Bernadette: “The tow truck didn’t scratch your car.”
Amy: “How do you know?”
Bernadette: “Cause I did it!”

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6. Season 5, Episode 21

Bernadette: “Sheldon doesn’t know when he’s being mean because the part of his brain that should know is getting a wedgie from the rest of his brain.”

Source: CBS

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5. Season 9, Episode 4

Bernadette: “Hey, if you’re open to living with someone great, I’ll give you $1,000 to take Stuart.”
Amy: “You really should’ve gone on the internet and checked how long that kind of thing lives before you got one.”
Bernadette: “I’m sorry. I just thought you might have a pasty, weirdo-shaped hole in your life.”

Source: CBS

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4. Season 8, Episode 5

Penny: “That sounds great but I have a little more studying to do.”
Amy: “Can you believe this nerd?”
Bernadette: “Come on, do you want to sit here being a loser, or do you want to watch me climb into an Australian man’s G-string like a baby kangaroo.”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=giefwSzHMnk&t=2m0s

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3. Season 5, Episode 10

Bernadette: “I’m too small for Twister. And roller coasters. And sitting with my feet on the floor. Hope you enjoyed the prenatal cigarettes, Mom.”

Source: CBS

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2. Season 7, Episode 5

Amy: “I’m leading a study to see if deficiency of the monoamine oxidase enzyme leads to paralyzing fear in monkeys.”
Bernadette: “If they’re anything like humans, the answer is yes.”
Amy: “You’ve done this experiment on humans?”
Bernadette: “You mean like death row inmates with nothing to lose? No, that would be unethical.”

Michael Yarish/©CBS/courtesy Everett Collection

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1. Season 10, Episode 18

Howard: “I don’t need butter.”
Bernadette: “If you want butter, I’ll get ya butter.”